Part of this process of finding myself means letting go.
It means shedding any unrealistic expectations I have for myself and lowering the bar, so I can excel in my dreams.
It means being myself -- not what others want me to be.
It means truly not caring what people think of me, how I look, what I do, and what I'm interested in. Because if it makes me happy, why do I need someone else to enjoy it?
It's interesting how many of us say we don't care, when we really do; how we act like we couldn't care less, when we could.
How we judge others by their differences, instead of embracing them for it.
We try to label things as humans, organize them in our minds to better understand them; tick off lists of requirements of a "true" {fill in the blank} and discard any who do not fill most, if not all of them.
We envy those with free minds, courage, mystery, determination, and the inability to give a rat's ass because we lack the willpower, independent thinking, and sheer nerve to be okay with being different and following our dreams.
So many of us are hypocrites in the sense of what we say we believe in and yet, don't live by our Facebook proclaimed beliefs.
I am not cut from a cookie cutter image. I don't care to fit some molded stereotype image that could be put on a tray and sent to grandma.
I'm like the extra pieces from outside the cut; the one you roll back into the dough so it doesn't go to waste.
Only I refuse to conform anymore. I've been rolled up too much by trying to fit into the mold.
I've always had a hard time fitting into the cookie cutter.
Only this time, I'm okay with being outside the shape prescribed to me.
It is mine and it's perfect the way it is. I've let go of trying to fit in whatsoever.
25 June 2012
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