A little over 9 months had passed since my oldest brother's tragic death. Less than six months after his death, I found out I'd have to leave school and had a load of backpay tuition to find out how to pay for, which triggered a lot of odd decisions in my life and contributed to my mental instability (read: depression and anxiety).
I was working, but not enough to pay off $7,000 worth of backpay tuition (and a hefty $50 late fee for every month the total balance wasn't paid...thanks, college!!).
I was working at Chili's and trying my hardest to move up to a higher paying job. It was rough, I was still a bit naive (without thinking I was) and I had no idea what I was going to do.
Fast forward to now...
That debt is paid as of 18 months ago, I've moved to a completely new area for love, figured out (realistically) the next few years of my life, established a career, and I'm happy about 80% of the time, even during tough times. I'm financially stable and planning ANOTHER cross country move and a three week trip to Europe. And finishing school is actually within the horizon...
Oh, and I also think things through instead of making rash decisions.
In a nutshell, I've grown a lot in the last three years. I'm still growing, but it's a process. 20 and 23 are very different ages for a lot of people, but for some, not much growth actually happens to people.
While the last 3 years haven't exactly been cherry pie, I wouldn't change them because I changed for the better. Things do get better, especially if you keep fighting whatever your fight is. Nothing can ever be perfect, but what does that old cliche say?
Life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% of how you respond to it.
Respond to your problems, don't react to them. Reacting means you're not in control. Responding means you're handling it with grace and maturity.
How have you changed in the last 3 years? What fight are you fighting right now?
4 comments:
You are amazing! It really sounds like you have changed so much. And for the better!! :) I know I have changed a lot too. Getting married and then having a baby has helped me to learn so much about myself.
Zoe,
You are fantastic! I know how hard some of the problems you are describing can be and you handled them with exceptional grace. Alpha Love sister!
I effing love you. Seeing your thought process here makes me smile :-) You can conquer the world if you wanted with your attitude Zoe!
In three years, we made the decision for me to be a stay at home mom after working every day of my life since I was 15, had a baby, made a major move that we were so scared to make back to our home across WA, but you knew all that already ;-)
GAZELLE INTENSITY!!! (Image me making horns with my fingers above my head kicking dirt around bahahahaha!)
And this is Caty by the way, I think I'm signed in on Derek's gmail...whoops
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